What to do if you have a neglecting relationship

Embarrassment, insults, accusations, and domestic violence are the most common forms of abuse in partnerships. Another sort of violence, on the other hand, is defined by its “invisibility.” This type of abuse is referred to as emotional neglect. What is emotional neglect in a relationship? In actuality, this is a disregard for a partner’s emotional needs, as well as a devaluation of a loved one’s thoughts and experiences, especially in the midst of some life crises and sufferings. Let’s take a closer look at emotional neglect and how to deal with it in a relationship. 

a sad couple

The moment when everything begins

Why do individuals seek a partner and form couples? Obviously, people do it to experience happy emotions and encourage one another. After all, even if you meet a single lady online, there is a certain spiritual connection that is developed between lovers. However, it is also uncommon for partners to lose interest in each other after many years of living together, and to refuse to aid and support their loved one in any way imaginable. What causes this to happen? Emotional neglect can be caused by a variety of factors.

Emotional exhaustion. This is one of the most prevalent preconditions for a couple’s neglect to arise. It’s a body’s reaction to being pressed too hard. In such instances, a person generally protects himself from other people’s concerns in order to save the remaining energy in the body.

Empathy deficit. Empathy is the capacity to sympathize with another, which activates the care mechanism for loved ones. As a result, a lack of empathy may be a contributing factor in the dismissal of a loved one’s feelings and needs.

Abuse of drugs and alcohol. The use of alcohol or drugs on a regular basis impairs one’s capacity to engage in normal social interactions.

Red flags

Even among professional psychologists, emotional neglect is seldom mentioned. Because, unlike psychological, physical, or sexual abuse, emotional neglect is difficult to detect, the majority of people are unaware of the situation. However, there are several telltale symptoms that a relationship is suffering from emotional neglect.

You spend free time apart

Emotional neglect is defined as a lack of time spent communicating with a loved one on a regular basis. As a result, your spouse will make up any reason to avoid seeing and dating you. A neglector usually refers to someone who is overly preoccupied with a job, friends, family, or whatever else. Your phone conversations are brief, and your partner’s responses are brief. Furthermore, the neglect or is uninterested in your concerns and does not desire physical closeness. You could have even detected indicators of infidelity in a relationship.

You are the only one who is trying

You have the impression that you are the one who constantly speaks in your relationship. You no longer believe that a loved one is even somewhat interested in or respectful of what you are expressing. Your significant other appears to dismiss all of your statements or even postpones the subject “until later,” clearly hoping that “later” will never arrive.

There are obvious examples of neglecting

Perhaps you recall your lover refusing to help you when you truly needed it? Perhaps you’ve heard comments like “don’t make things up, it won’t hurt,” “don’t pretend, you don’t feel that horrible,” “you don’t need it at all,” or “you don’t really want it”? All of this is a clear indicator of a relationship’s emotional neglect.

No responsibility

In a good relationship, partners always attempt to assist each other in many ways to avoid a loved one’s physical or mental fatigue. However, because neglecters are unconcerned about their partners’ sentiments, they frequently shirk their responsibilities to a loved one and avoid any duty. For example, this frequently occurs in couples following the birth of a child, when the wife bears sole responsibility for household chores and child-rearing, and the husband refuses to assist and support the cherished lady. One of the most visible indications of emotional neglect in a marriage is this.

You feel lonely

Even if you’re already in a relationship, feeling lonely might be one of the signs of emotional neglect on your partner’s behalf. After all, everyone needs emotional release from time to time, and couples in love always want to feel their significant other’s love, care, support, and understanding — this is what makes them feel needed for one other. However, in the event of emotional neglect, you do not receive the care and support that you desire from your spouse, and as a result, you are lonely.

How does it affect people?

In most cases, “silent” violence in a relationship is the precursor to more violent abuse. Victims of neglect, who are continuously informed that their needs are unimportant, that their aspirations are ridiculous, and that their efforts are insufficient, lose trust in themselves and begin to accept neglect as a natural compliment. As a result, there are a variety of significant consequences:

How to struggle in such a situation

a couple on the couch

Victims of neglect frequently believe that they are unable to improve their situation and that their relationship is bound to collapse. This, however, is not the case. It is possible to recover from emotional neglect in a relationship, and these suggestions will assist you in doing so!

Think everything over

You’ve already made a crucial step in dealing with relationship neglect: you’ve identified a problem. It is now worthwhile to examine it. However, be aware that identifying the causes for such conduct would be more difficult than if your partner was abusing you emotionally. The patterns, as well as the causes for such repellent conduct, are frequently clear in the second situation. When dealing with emotional neglect, though, things get more difficult, so be patient and consider what could be causing your loved one’s behavior.

Discuss the problem

In a good relationship, couples know how to work together to solve difficulties and share everything. After all, the basis of a great love relationship is sincerity and honesty. As a result, you should talk to your partner about your relationship’s neglect. That being said, be open and honest with your spouse about how you feel when he or she disregards your feelings and needs. After that, work together with your loved one to discover a solution to the situation.

Care about yourself

A self-respecting individual would never accept emotional neglect in a relationship or surrender to the influence of others over one’s own views and interests. Raising self-esteem and working on a sense of self-worth are two methods to combat neglect in a relationship. On the Internet, you can discover a lot of good information on how to do this, or you may hire a certified professional to assist you. This will assist you in many ways, not just in romantic relationships but also in general social ties!

Do something you like

Common interests and activities bring couples closer together and enable them to spend more time together. Furthermore, it is a great method to get to know each other better since you will interact and have fun while doing something you both like. As a result, a shared pastime enriches romantic relationships and aids those in love in better understanding their partners.

Ask friends and family to help you

Social bonds allow you to get an unbiased assessment of the situation and, if necessary, obtain help and support. It’s vital to remember that seeking and getting assistance is entirely natural, just like “washing your filthy clothes in public” or trying to find out what’s wrong with your marriage. Supportive family and friends always have your best interests at heart and can act as a “bridge” to assist you in leaving an abusive relationship. By joining together, you may become a tower of strength for individuals you care about, allowing you to face even the most difficult life difficulties together.


In their romantic relationships, couples confront numerous challenges, but emotional neglect is one of the issues that may ruin love and put an end to even the strongest partnerships. In truth, this is a form of passive abuse that is difficult to spot. It can also have a lot of harmful implications, not just for the victims but also for the perpetrators. Even yet, it is possible to resist neglect in a relationship. As a result, if you find yourself in a relationship with a neglectful partner, follow the advice above and everything will be OK! We wish you happiness and empyrean love!